{"id":20151,"date":"2016-06-07T17:00:49","date_gmt":"2016-06-07T13:00:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/?p=20151"},"modified":"2016-06-07T18:15:30","modified_gmt":"2016-06-07T14:15:30","slug":"b%c9%99lk%c9%99-h%c9%99yatam-m%c9%99n-b%c9%99lk%c9%99-d%c9%99-olum-bir-ail%c9%99-h%c9%99yati-drami","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/?p=20151","title":{"rendered":"B\u0259lk\u0259 h\u0259yatam m\u0259n, b\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 \u00f6l\u00fcm\u2026 (Bir ail\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131 dram\u0131)"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"ge\"<\/a><\/p>\n

H\u0259r k\u0259s \u00f6l\u00fcmd\u0259n qorxar, bir m\u0259nd\u0259n savay\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

H\u0259r k\u0259s \u00f6l\u00fcmd\u0259n ed\u0259r ehtiyat, m\u0259ns\u0259 etm\u0259r\u0259m\u2026<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259 \u0259b\u0259diy\u0259m, \u00f6l\u00fcms\u00fcz\u0259m m\u0259n, x\u0259b\u0259rim yoxdur \u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259n?!<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259, m\u0259n\u0259m h\u0259yat, ya da ki, \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn \u00f6z\u00fc?!<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259!<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259 m\u0259l\u0259y\u0259m m\u0259n?!<\/p>\n

G\u00f6yl\u0259rd\u0259 \u00e7ox idi s\u0259hvl\u0259rim, d\u00fcz\u0259ltm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn, c\u0259za kimi g\u00f6nd\u0259ribl\u0259r m\u0259ni yer \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259?!<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259 qanadlar\u0131m q\u0131r\u0131l\u0131b, b\u0259lk\u0259 \u015f\u0259rl\u0259 sava\u015fda yaralanm\u0131\u015fam, d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f\u0259m buraya?! S\u0259hv salm\u0131\u015fam m\u0259kan\u0131, zaman\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259, var t\u0259yinat\u0131m, insanlar\u0131 qaytarmaq haqq yoluna, insanlar\u0131 insan etm\u0259kdir \u0259sas t\u0259yinat\u0131m\u2026<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

Bu sirrdir, m\u0259nim sirrim, agah olmayacaq art\u0131q kims\u0259y\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

Bu yerd\u0259 susmal\u0131yam\u2026<\/p>\n

N\u0259dir, ey insan, fikrin?!<\/p>\n

Bezmis\u0259n h\u0259yatdan?<\/p>\n

At\u0131rsan \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131na?<\/p>\n

Etm\u0259, qurban olaram\u2026 Bax, ax\u0131r h\u0259r g\u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n ya\u015f, bir, iki, \u00fc\u00e7 damc\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

S\u00fckan arxas\u0131nda olan da insand\u0131r ax\u0131, onu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn, add\u0131m\u0131n\u0131 atmam\u0131\u015fdan \u00f6nc\u0259.<\/p>\n

Onun n\u0259 g\u00fcnah\u0131 var, s\u0259nin \u00f6lm\u0259k ist\u0259yind\u0259 pay\u0131 var?!<\/p>\n

Yoxdur ax\u0131!<\/p>\n

Qoy \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc onun yerin\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

Yand\u0131rmazd\u0131 s\u0259ni kims\u0259 s\u0259n\u0259 ets\u0259ydi bunu?! Yand\u0131rard\u0131, \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 nec\u0259!<\/p>\n

Bir d\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn, s\u0259n\u0259 do\u011fma olan insanlar\u0131, s\u0259ni itir\u0259c\u0259k \u015f\u0259xsl\u0259ri?!<\/p>\n

Varsa, onlar, deyils\u0259ns\u0259, tam t\u0259nha, kims\u0259siz\u2026 Nec\u0259 q\u0131y\u0131rsan onlara?!<\/p>\n

Yoxdursa, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 q\u0131yma bar\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

\u00c7\u0259kil ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131n yolundan, cavansan h\u0259l\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

M\u0259ns\u0259\u2026 M\u0259ns\u0259, ya\u015fam\u0131\u015fam ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

Onsuz da \u00f6l\u0259n deyil\u0259m, onsuz da g\u00f6rm\u00fcrs\u0259n m\u0259ni\u2026<\/p>\n

M\u0259n s\u0259nin i\u00e7ind\u0259ki s\u0259s, vicdan kimiy\u0259m\u2026<\/p>\n

Varam b\u0259z\u0259n, b\u0259z\u0259n is\u0259 yoxam\u2026<\/p>\n

\u0130nsandan insana vard\u0131r f\u0259rqi\u2026<\/p>\n

M\u0259n ruh kimiy\u0259m, ham\u0131 dan\u0131\u015far varl\u0131\u011f\u0131mdan, az insanlar g\u00f6r\u0259r m\u0259ni\u2026<\/p>\n

Se\u00e7ilmi\u015fs\u0259n b\u0259lk\u0259, f\u0259rqlis\u0259n b\u0259lk\u0259?!<\/p>\n

Niy\u0259 t\u0259l\u0259sirs\u0259n, ax\u0131 \u00f6lm\u0259y\u0259?!<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259 bir daha \u015fans ver\u0259s\u0259n \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259, ya\u015fama\u011fa?!<\/p>\n

Dayan, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259y\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259r m\u0259nc\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

Ya\u015fama\u011fa d\u0259y\u0259r m\u0259nc\u0259, t\u0259l\u0259sm\u0259, ver\u0259rk\u0259n q\u0259rarlar\u0131n\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

Allah\u0131n verdiyi can\u0131 alma\u011fa yoxdur haqq\u0131n\u2026<\/p>\n

Daha bir g\u00fcnah i\u015fl\u0259m\u0259 art\u0131q\u2026<\/p>\n

Dayan, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn, ya\u015fama\u011fa t\u0259l\u0259s\u2026<\/p>\n

\u00d6l\u00fcm onsuz da g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259k dal\u0131nca\u2026<\/p>\n

Bu g\u00fcn, ya sabah, be\u015f ild\u0259n sonra, on ild\u0259n sonra, n\u0259 f\u0259rqi var ki?!<\/p>\n

Dayan, q\u0131z\u0131m, hara t\u0259l\u0259sirs\u0259n?!<\/p>\n

Cavansan, q\u0131yma \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259, i\u00e7ind\u0259 olan k\u00f6rp\u0259 balana, m\u0259hv etm\u0259 onu\u2026<\/p>\n

G\u00fcnah etm\u0259mis\u0259n ax\u0131, ets\u0259n d\u0259, o g\u00fcnahs\u0131zd\u0131r\u2026<\/p>\n

Olan olub\u2026 Ke\u00e7mi\u015fini unut getsin, ba\u015fla yeni h\u0259yata\u2026<\/p>\n

Sil, s\u0131f\u0131rla\u2026 S\u0259n v\u0259 balan\u2026<\/p>\n

Bir d\u0259 ax\u0131, O, s\u0259ni bilir \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 m\u0259l\u0259k, sevmirs\u0259n onu?!<\/p>\n

Sevirs\u0259n ax\u0131! Bilir\u0259m, sevirs\u0259n!<\/p>\n

Bax, g\u00f6r\u00fcrs\u0259n, haql\u0131yam, t\u0259r\u0259dd\u00fcd i\u00e7ind\u0259s\u0259n!<\/p>\n

\u00d6ld\u00fcrm\u0259 onu\u2026 O bir h\u0259yatd\u0131r, g\u00fcnahs\u0131z h\u0259yat\u2026<\/p>\n

Q\u0131yma \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259, q\u0131yma ona\u2026<\/p>\n

Qoy ya\u015fas\u0131n\u2026 Kim n\u0259 dey\u0259c\u0259k, fikir el\u0259m\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

Ruzisini Allah ver\u0259c\u0259k, t\u0259l\u0259sm\u0259, q\u0131z\u0131m\u2026<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259, sonra olmayacaq he\u00e7 \u00f6vlad\u0131n?!<\/p>\n

Ana, dayan! Saxla \u0259lini, qald\u0131rma yuxar\u0131, sal a\u015fa\u011f\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

Utanm\u0131rsan, s\u0259n Anasan?!<\/p>\n

C\u0259nn\u0259t vard\u0131r ayaqlar\u0131n alt\u0131nda\u2026<\/p>\n

Yuxar\u0131 ba\u015fda g\u00fcnah, c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m, a\u015fa\u011f\u0131da c\u0259nn\u0259t, n\u0259yim\u0259 laz\u0131md\u0131r\u2026<\/p>\n

N\u0259yim\u0259 laz\u0131md\u0131r bel\u0259 ziddiyy\u0259t\u2026<\/p>\n

S\u0259n, Anasan, vurma balan\u0131, danlama\u2026<\/p>\n

Oturun \u00fcz-\u00fcz\u0259 payla\u015f\u0131n, dan\u0131\u015f\u0131n, d\u0259rdl\u0259\u015fin, dinl\u0259m\u0259yi \u00f6yr\u0259n, xahi\u015f edir\u0259m\u2026<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259, s\u0259n haql\u0131 deyils\u0259n, n\u0259 olsun ki, ya\u015fca b\u00f6y\u00fcks\u0259n?!<\/p>\n

N\u0259 olsun ki, s\u0259n do\u011fmusan onu?!<\/p>\n

Yoxdur haqq\u0131n onu d\u00f6ym\u0259y\u0259, yoxdur haqq\u0131n s\u00f6ym\u0259y\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

Onsuz da indi hirslis\u0259n, q\u0259z\u0259b s\u0259ni vadar edir bu kobudlu\u011fa, q\u0259z\u0259b s\u0259ni dindirir, idar\u0259 edir\u2026<\/p>\n

Dayan, sakitl\u0259\u015f\u2026<\/p>\n

Bax bel\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

N\u0259f\u0259s al, ver, d\u0259rind\u0259n\u2026<\/p>\n

Bax bel\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

Sakitl\u0259\u015fdin?!<\/p>\n

Ax\u0131, indi pe\u015fimansan\u2026<\/p>\n

\u00dczr ist\u0259, \u00f6vlad\u0131ndan\u2026<\/p>\n

\u00d6p, qucaqla!<\/p>\n

O, s\u0259ni sevir, s\u0259n d\u0259 ki, onu!<\/p>\n

Ax\u0131, s\u0259n Anasan, onun anas\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

Ay\u0131rmas\u0131n anadan \u00f6vlad\u0131 Allah\u2026<\/p>\n

Q\u0131ymazsan ax\u0131 ona pisliyi, niy\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn edirs\u0259n ona pislik?!<\/p>\n

Kim deyib ki, arzulad\u0131\u011f\u0131n, s\u0259n dediyin, se\u00e7diyin, verdiyin q\u0259rar onun xeyrin\u0259 olacaq?!<\/p>\n

Zamin durursan?!<\/p>\n

Yox ax\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

Sus, o zaman, ba\u011f\u0131\u015fla, bar\u0131\u015f\u2026<\/p>\n

Bax, art\u0131q i\u00e7in yan\u0131r, haql\u0131 oldu\u011fumu bilirs\u0259n, a\u011flay\u0131rsan\u2026<\/p>\n

Ki\u015fi, dayan. S\u0259n ki\u015fis\u0259n!<\/p>\n

Vard\u0131r evind\u0259 halal qad\u0131n\u0131n, g\u00f6z\u0259l, sa\u011flam, s\u0259nin diqq\u0259tin\u0259, sevgin\u0259 h\u0259sr\u0259t bir qad\u0131n\u2026<\/p>\n

Bir d\u0259 evind\u0259 yolunu g\u00f6zl\u0259yir \u00f6vlad\u0131n\u2026<\/p>\n

G\u00f6zl\u0259yir n\u0259 vaxt atas\u0131 i\u015fd\u0259n ev\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259k!<\/p>\n

\u018flind\u0259 ona bir pay olacaq, o, sevin\u0259c\u0259k, at\u0131lacaq qoynuna\u2026<\/p>\n

\u201cAta, s\u0259ni \u00e7ox sevir\u0259m\u2026\u201d dey\u0259c\u0259k\u2026<\/p>\n

Nec\u0259 q\u0131y\u0131rsan onlara?!<\/p>\n

H\u0259yat\u0131nda var ba\u015fqas\u0131, ba\u015fqa qad\u0131n\u2026<\/p>\n

Nec\u0259 q\u0131y\u0131rsan ail\u0259n\u0259?!<\/p>\n

N\u0259dir onlar\u0131n g\u00fcnah\u0131, getmirs\u0259n ev\u0259, ged\u0259nd\u0259 d\u0259 gec gedirs\u0259n, varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 unutmu\u015flar y\u0259qin ki\u2026<\/p>\n

Geyin paltar\u0131n\u0131 geriy\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

\u00c7\u0131x bu yerd\u0259n, m\u0259kandan, unut \u00fcnvan\u0131, bu yad qad\u0131n\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

Bu sevgi deyil.<\/p>\n

Oyundur, \u0259yl\u0259nc\u0259dir, bir ehtirasd\u0131r\u2026 Bu bir g\u00fcnahd\u0131r\u2026<\/p>\n

Bu bir h\u0259yatd\u0131r\u2026<\/p>\n

Ail\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

Da\u011f\u0131tma onu, d\u00fcnyan\u0131 da\u011f\u0131tma\u2026<\/p>\n

Sevgini, s\u0259ad\u0259ti k\u0259narda axtarma\u2026<\/p>\n

\u00dc\u00e7bucaq olmamal\u0131d\u0131r\u2026<\/p>\n

\u00dc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc \u015f\u0259xs h\u0259r zaman art\u0131qd\u0131r\u2026<\/p>\n

Dayan art\u0131q!<\/p>\n

Dayan!<\/p>\n

Get evin\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

Bax bel\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

Bu qad\u0131ndan qalma nigaran\u2026<\/p>\n

Bir subay ki\u015fi \u00e7\u0131xar ona sahib, m\u00fctl\u0259q \u00e7\u0131xar bir ki\u015fi, b\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 evl\u0259n\u0259r, olar \u00f6z ail\u0259si\u2026<\/p>\n

Burax, o, qad\u0131n\u0131, qurban olaram\u2026<\/p>\n

Qoy, o, da olsun xo\u015fb\u0259xt, o, da olsun ana\u2026<\/p>\n

Olsun, onun da ail\u0259si\u2026<\/p>\n

S\u0259n vermirs\u0259n, verm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259ks\u0259n bunlar\u0131 ona\u2026<\/p>\n

O zaman q\u0131yma, x\u0259yan\u0259tin, ehtiras\u0131n m\u0259hv etm\u0259sin \u00fc\u00e7 t\u0259r\u0259fi, ail\u0259nin \u00fczvl\u0259rini, s\u0259ni, bir d\u0259 o, qad\u0131n\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

Qay\u0131t evin\u0259\u2026 Bax bel\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

D\u00f6y, evinin qap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131\u2026 U\u015fa\u011f\u0131n\u0131n s\u0259sini e\u015fidirs\u0259n?!<\/p>\n

\u201cAna, atamd\u0131r, urrrrraaaaa! Atam ev\u0259 bu g\u00fcn tez g\u0259libdir, Ana!<\/p>\n

Bu g\u00fcn m\u0259nim ad g\u00fcn\u00fcmd\u00fcr ax\u0131\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Eh, ay ki\u015fi, s\u0259n atasan\u2026<\/p>\n

Unutmusan bu g\u00fcn\u00fc d\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

\u00d6vlad\u0131n\u0131n do\u011fum g\u00fcn\u00fc, be\u015f ya\u015f\u0131 tamam olur ax\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

D\u00fcn\u0259n d\u0259, h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131n\u0131n do\u011fum g\u00fcn\u00fc idi, evind\u0259 olmam\u0131san, t\u0259brik etm\u0259mis\u0259n onu, o, a\u011flay\u0131b b\u00fct\u00fcn g\u00fcn\u00fc!<\/p>\n

B\u0259tnind\u0259 s\u0259nin ikinci balan!<\/p>\n

\u00d6ld\u00fcrm\u0259k ist\u0259yirdi, onu da, s\u0259ni c\u0259zaland\u0131racaqd\u0131 bununla guya\u2026<\/p>\n

Yolda atacaqd\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131na\u2026<\/p>\n

Al\u0131nmasayd\u0131, ed\u0259c\u0259kdir abort\u2026<\/p>\n

Hirsli qay\u0131dacaqd\u0131 ev\u0259, d\u00f6y\u0259c\u0259kdi, s\u00f6y\u0259c\u0259kdi ilk \u00f6vlad\u0131n\u0131z\u0131, g\u00fcnahkar bil\u0259c\u0259kdi s\u0259ni b\u00fct\u00fcn b\u0259db\u0259xtlikl\u0259rind\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

O, bilir ki, vard\u0131r ba\u015fqa qad\u0131n, anlay\u0131r ki, da\u011f\u0131l\u0131r ail\u0259si\u2026<\/p>\n

S\u0259ni sevs\u0259 d\u0259, qaytara bilm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259k s\u0259ni, s\u0259n ist\u0259m\u0259s\u0259n\u2026<\/p>\n

M\u0259n saxlad\u0131m onu bu g\u00fcn \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn b\u00fct\u00fcn s\u0259hvl\u0259rd\u0259n, m\u0259n qorudum, onu, b\u0259tnind\u0259ki \u00f6vlad\u0131, m\u0259n qorudum ilk \u00f6vlad\u0131n\u0131z\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

M\u0259n saxlad\u0131m s\u0259ni n\u00f6vb\u0259ti g\u00fcnahdan, m\u0259n qaytard\u0131m s\u0259ni evin\u0259\u2026<\/p>\n

M\u0259n qorudum ail\u0259nizi\u2026<\/p>\n

Bunu unutma!<\/p>\n

M\u0259n s\u0259nin \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259m!<\/p>\n

Vicdan, h\u0259yat v\u0259 \u00f6l\u00fcm!<\/p>\n

\u0130\u00e7ind\u0259ki s\u0259s\u0259m, i\u00e7ind\u0259ki \u00fcmid, inamam, m\u0259n h\u0259r \u015fey\u0259m!<\/p>\n

S\u0259nin inand\u0131\u011f\u0131n, \u00e7ox zaman unutdu\u011fun insanl\u0131q, Allah kimi\u2026<\/p>\n

Allah var!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

H\u0259r k\u0259s \u00f6l\u00fcmd\u0259n qorxar, bir m\u0259nd\u0259n savay\u0131\u2026 H\u0259r k\u0259s \u00f6l\u00fcmd\u0259n ed\u0259r ehtiyat, m\u0259ns\u0259 etm\u0259r\u0259m\u2026 B\u0259lk\u0259 \u0259b\u0259diy\u0259m, \u00f6l\u00fcms\u00fcz\u0259m m\u0259n, x\u0259b\u0259rim yoxdur \u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259n?! B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259, m\u0259n\u0259m h\u0259yat, ya da ki, \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn \u00f6z\u00fc?! B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259! B\u0259lk\u0259 m\u0259l\u0259y\u0259m m\u0259n?! G\u00f6yl\u0259rd\u0259 \u00e7ox idi s\u0259hvl\u0259rim, d\u00fcz\u0259ltm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn, c\u0259za kimi g\u00f6nd\u0259ribl\u0259r m\u0259ni yer \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259?! B\u0259lk\u0259 qanadlar\u0131m q\u0131r\u0131l\u0131b, b\u0259lk\u0259 \u015f\u0259rl\u0259 sava\u015fda yaralanm\u0131\u015fam, d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f\u0259m […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20151","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-pub"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20151","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=20151"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20151\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20157,"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20151\/revisions\/20157"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=20151"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=20151"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/edebiyyat-az.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=20151"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}